April 1st, 2009. Due to three of my children being diabolically excellent at April Fool's Jokes, this might actually qualify as the worst hypothetical day of my life. It was only hypothetical because none of it was true, of course. Too bad I found that out way late in the day. The day I found out Valentine was forced into a shotgun marriage due to an unplanned pregnancy and my husband knew all about it but refused to tell me. The day Veritas announced she'd be spending the summer in an unwed mother's home in Virginia. The day Willard brought home the note announcing his removal from class by security because he refused to leave and called the teacher vile names under his breath.
Also. Happy. Freakin'. 26th. Anniversary.
I just want to get this down for posterity and also as a reminder of the fabulous and hilarious jokes I can help my grandchildren play on their parents. Please send any and all truly awful ideas. I'm so up for it.
The pumpkin spent the night last night. We were laying in bed. I was hoping she would finally go to sleep. She was hoping she would be able to talk all night. The TV was on and that Ambien commerical came on. You know the one where the lady keeps waking up in the middle of the night with a rooster crowing at just the wrong time?
And the pumpkin says, "We need to get that!"
And I said, "Ambien?!?"
And she said, "Yeah! Ambien."
And I said, "Er, Why?"
And she said, "Cause if you don't have it, Granny, chickens come and sleep with you!"
As opposed to pumpkins?
Vision had day surgery today. Her shoulder has been a mess for her this last year. Resting it hasn't helped, not tumbling and doing the triple throw down zip spin back flip hasn't helped, physical therapy hasn't helped, so we did all the doctor stuff you do before they tell you she needs a scope.
We had the scope today. The pumpkin was mad that we wouldn't let her go to the hospital with us this morning and dropped her off at home on the way. That's a miracle, 'cause she said she was never going back to the hospital for any reason. She loves her Aunt Ninnin, I guess, or was eager to find new reasons to yell at doctors.
Vision is doing well so far. According to the doctors, this is a really painful surgery so I'm concerned, but Vision is tough as a boot, as evidenced by that fact that she's hacked off at me because I wouldn't let her go to the movies tonight with her best friend. As far as she's concerned, she's fine. We'll wait for the universal pain block to wear down in order to make an official call, but she's in the living room watching "10 Things I Hate About You" with Veritas and Rachel, so she's in pretty good shape.
Pray for a good weekend. I know I am!